Pictures from the show

Full 12 week comparison shots

Last days leading up to the show

The last couple days that led up to the show were definitely the hardest to get through. These were the days where my body was weak, my mind was slow and I was out of my element. There were so many mixed emotions and feelings leading up to the show that it made me second guess myself. I can honestly say that I was not myself at all the last three days before the show and now that I'm looking back I think that that's why I was so freaked out and scared. I was scared that I was changing into something that I did not want to be. I realize now that that is not the case at all. I was depleted and my body and mind were not working together as one and I started to lose myself in the process. I basically was a zombie until I got to go on stage and compete. The last few days before the show is when the competitors pull our water weight. So basically we don't take in any water, I'm not sure if this is what messed up my mind and turned me into a zombie but I'm pretty sure that it is. When I was backstage Friday night I was psyching myself out and making myself more nervous than I ever should have been. But, like I've said before I think it is one of my coping mechanisms in how I deal with stress. I'm not sure why I make myself feel MORE stressed to cope but whatever works, works. After being filled with water and a bunch of sugars and carbs I feel a lot more normal and back to my usual positive upbeat self. It is amazing how food affects your brain, mood and just everything. 

11 DAYS LEFT

Alright I'm getting super excited and pumped for these last 11 days. I have to give this everything I've got. My diet is changing but that is OKAY. I want this so bad. I can't believe how far I have already made it. I have been working for this moment since April. This is much bigger than any placement. This is about my progress and lifestyle change. I could care-less if I place or not. All I care about is that I MADE IT. That I did everything in my power to not miss any cardio, workouts, meals or sleep. I have followed everything to a T and I know it's going to pay off. I have some big plans this week to keep my mind and self busy. First off I get my hair done Friday the 8th. YIPPEE. Also I have my first photo shoot with other girls from my team on Sunday which I'm super excited for as well. Sunday the 10th also happens to be my birthday, what better way to celebrate my birthday in front of a camera? HA! So excited. This has seriously been the best experience of my life and I'm so excited to keep eating clean, of course after I have a little bit of fun. I'ts alright to indulge from time to time but best believe I will still be in the gym getting some workouts done. It's so crazy how much your life can change, if you just put forth the effort. Change is possible, scary, but very possible. 

IT'S ALL OVER!

My first NPC figure show happened this weekend Nov 15-16th ! I got top 5 and placed 3rd in my class which was figure class D. I cannot even believe it. It hasn't really hit me yet. The past weekend has been insane, full of the best memories of my life. I look back at some of my competition pictures and can't believe that I actually did it, I did it 100. I followed through with what I said that I would do in April, it's about to make me cry. The feelings I have are overwhelming. This whole experience has been overwhelming. I had something to prove to myself and I did just that. Now it's time to prove to myself that I can do much more. I have proven that I really can do anything that I set my mind to. I have so much running through my mind now it's insane. I literally cannot stop myself from thinking about a million different things at once. But, the only thing that is now on my mind is making sure that I follow through with every thing that I have planned. My priorities are starting to shift and right now I'm graduating with my BS in Criminology and Criminal Justice at ASU. Although fitness is a huge part of my life, as it will stay, I have to shift my focus back to my studies to get through the remainder of the semester. Sometimes I freak myself out and get myself stressed and anxious for no reason. I hate how I operate like that sometimes but I guess I might work better under pressure. There are so many different blog topics that I need to get started on I'm going to write the different topics out and hopefully get to at least one or two of them this week. I have to organize everything or it's just going to get too chaotic. My mind is still spinning around like crazy! This weekend by far was the best weekend of my life, even with all the stress, there is nothing that I would have changed about this weekend and I'm so happy that I made this decision to change, because it changed who I am, but I go to sleep happy and wake up happy. In the end, my own happiness is the most important thing to me. It feels good to finally be happy with myself and truly love myself.